Monthly Archives: February 2012

Eating Disorders

So for a while after the overdose, everything seemed to be running smoothly, I had gone back to school after the holidays, I had ‘turned over a new leaf’, and despite the scarring on my arm, I appeared relatively stable. I was going through a period of no self harm (that I can remember anyway) […]


By this time I was seventeen, and had various other things going on in my life. I met a girl called Becki who suffered seriously with self harm, cutting much deeper than I ever had. It was at this time I first understood the concept of being ‘triggered’. After seeing deep cuts on her arm […]

CAMHS and my first big lie

Alongside a prescription for Citalopram, I was also given a referral to CAMHS (Child and Mental Health Services). I remember meeting with the lady, who was stern and imposing. She asked for my life story in its entirety but did not advise me on any future help that I should seek. I believe I stayed […]

My introduction to prescription pills

So, I was sat one day at school when my phone rings, and it’s the bus driver. He tells there’s something he wants to say to me but he doesn’t know how to say it. I tell him to just get on with it, so he tells me he wants to f*ck me. Just like […]

Problems with intimacy

Still, through my teenage years, I had not experienced the NHS, or been given any form of label for my mental issues. I felt uncomfortable around boys, I remember several dates where I was completely dehabilitated by nerves and anxiety – I could not understand why to other people it came so easy. I was […]

My first experiences with self harm

For a while after I joined secondary school, I was doing ok. Despite always feeling as though I was ‘different’, that it was the rest of the class against ‘me’ I seemed to fit in better at a much bigger school with a lot more people in my class. That said, I was still a […]