YOUR FIRST LOVE
This takes some thinking about. I never loved a man (or thought I loved a man) until I was at university, and with my boyfriend ben. I think back now, and I didn’t really love him, it was more being in love with the situation rather than the person. So, you could say my first ‘person’ love was Jean, the woman I lived with for two years. Our relationship was deeper than any I had ever had before, more attached on so many levels, so damaging when it ended.
Before that, my loves were animals. My first love would be the pony I had when I was 12. He was my entire life, I lived, breathed and dreamed this pony. Is it normal for love to fade with time? When I think back to him now, I don’t feel anything other than the distant memory, but at the time I knew I would never be able to live without him. The same with the animals that came after him – and all the same ending. Is this a BPD thing or is this a normal thing?
Take Care. x